Much of the population is concerned about their eating habits and weight. This is a good practice. However, you may face times of great trouble. Maybe there is a reunion or special event on the horizon. You have procrastinated a great deal and there is no time to lose weight. The time for miracles is past. What you need, is a very good excuse. Here are some things that you may wish to consider.
A good excuse for your weight may be a rare metabolic condition. Make it so rare that nobody has ever heard of it. In fact, it is best to do it that way. This condition is brought about by the use of an electric hand mixer. It causes unexplained weight gain, especially when you make cakes. You may also wish to throw in a few seldom heard medical terms. Watch a good hospital show on television. This is a good way to learn things.
Of course, you are doing all you can for this condition. Nothing that you have tried is working. All efforts are meeting with disappointment and failure. Some people may believe you. They may choose not to believe you. This often happens with lame excuses.
Perhaps demonic possession would be a better reason for your weight problem. It is trendy topic. It is also very hard to prove or disprove. This makes it a good excuse for things. It is being blamed for many things. Why not throw obesity into the mix of things. Start your story off with a normal day in your life. You were making a salad or perhaps a healthy smoothie with a hand blender. You suddenly felt a strange presence. Appliances started acting oddly.
Kitchen appliances act oddly at times. Perhaps they are possessed too. Details like this are difficult to dispute. They are like UFO accounts. Maybe they happen. Maybe they do not. You may say that this event has drawn you to fattening foods. Things have been different since then.
Maybe another demon has possessed the remote control to your TV. That is why you can never find it. It may change channels to food commercials, frequently. It might turn the volume up on certain commercials. This may be why commercial volumes are so loud.
Perhaps there is an entire population of demons. It is their job to torment humanity with fattening foods. They receive a lot of entertainment from this. They have their own television shows in Hades about humans and food. Funny videos and stupid people tricks are a common occurrence, there. Do not get too carried away with your story. Someone may wish to carry you away. Make your tale about demonic possession believable, if possible. There is no cure. You only hope is to shine the spotlight on the problem.
Conclusion
You may need a quick excuse for being overweight. Maybe you need to attend an important event. You may consider a rare condition that is tied to your Cuisinart hand mixer. Perhaps you will choose the demonic possession excuse. You may not choose any excuse, and face the problem head-on. This may be your best alternative.
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